According to spiritualist, Buddhist and Hindu traditions, it is the goal of the spiritual soul to eliminate all of the karma we have incurred throughout this and all previous lifetimes. Karma is created through thoughts, feelings beliefs and actions. Much of our karmic debt stems from our relationships with others. Our karma can stem from romantic partnerships, unrequited love, parent-child relationships, sibling, neighbor, co-worker- pretty much any type of interpersonal relationship has the potential to create karma.

Karma, according to the above faiths, is considered neither positive nor negative- it just is. What causes karma is energy. This energy flows via the law of cause and effect. Though there are innumerable types of karmic relationships, perhaps the most challenging ones to battle are those of a lover or a close family member.

Those of us who have been confronted with relationship karma contracts are all too familiar with their gravity. And we never quite adjust to the rollercoaster that comes along with being invested in them.


As spiritual warriors, we are always being confronted with echoes of our past. These echoes may be relative to our current life however, they often extend beyond the lives we currently know all the way back to previous lives.  Though the circumstances, time periods and roles we played may have been different in these previous lives, one thing remains the same- the tumultuous nature of our relationships.

Karma contracts, also known as soul contracts, are contracts that are agreed upon before we incarnate onto Earth in this life. In keeping with the spiritualist philosophy that we choose the details of our lives before we incarnate in order to learn the lessons that our souls need to learn, soul contracts are written for the purpose of healing our karma with ourselves and the other individuals involved. One type of karma is the “carry over” of unresolved issues from a former life to the next. Karma (soul) contracts are covenants that we created along with The Creator and other pertinent souls before incarnation in this life. In this three-way agreement, it is “stated” that we will encounter the other souls involved in our next incarnation so that we are able to heal any unresolved issues we have created with them in previous lives. And, if the unresolved issues remain unresolved, we will incarnate in further lives until we heal our own aspect of the karma. We subject ourselves to reincarnating time and time again with the same person/people and living out the same karmic pattern.


Whereas some may believe that healing karma with others involves direct contact or discussion with said others, in fact it does not. It is unnecessary to heal our karma contracts with the others involved. Due to the idea that all souls are in different places on their individual soul path journeys, it is not always possible to find that the recipients of our soul contracts will be on a sympathetic wavelength to ours. This means that it’s likely that the other souls involved in our soul contract may not be ready to heal; or even be aware of what needs healing. Therefore, any attempt made to resolve the issues with the person directly could seriously impede our progress. And, depending on the nature of the relationship, may very well cause further karma to be created between the individuals involved. Because these other souls may not be I the same place as we are in terms of wanting to heal, we will likely spend many unnecessary tedious periods of time agonizing over these relationships. This can become quite taxing on our energies of body, mind and spirit. Further, spending this time agonizing over loved ones or circumstances will create more karma- just the opposite of our soul’s intention.

With the realization that we need not obtain closure from the others involved in the soul contract, we can free ourselves from the binding contracts. It is unnecessary for those of us who are aware that we are a part of the soul contract to share this information with the others involved. In fact, we probably shouldn’t. This healing of our karma contract is not about mending our relationships with others per se, it is about healing our role in said relationship. This is especially valid when others are not ready to heal. Working on self can be tremendously challenging and some may not yet be up to the challenge. That is their choice, and it is not our responsibility to change it. In fact, the sum and parts of our responsibility in this matter is to heal ourselves apart from anyone else involved.

The first step in healing from the contracts is to recognize when you’re in one. There are common symptoms and attributes of soul contract relationships. Common symptoms include but are not limited to:

  • Feeling drained or sick after thinking about/being around someone
  • A feeling as if you’ve been punched in the gut when thinking about the person
  • Persistent nightmares or anxious dreams about the person
  • Continuously crying, depression or other stress-related illnesses stemming from interactions (including obsessive thoughts) about/with the person
  • Obsessive thoughts about the person
  • Soul-recognition- the first time you met the person, you feel like you’ve met them before without any rational explanation
  • That person exhibits any of the above symptoms toward you
  • Unfounded fear/jealousy surrounding the person
  • Physical, emotional or mental abuse from or toward the person



We can assuredly understand that by recognizing our parts in the contracts, forgiving ourselves for our parts in the contracts and healing our own parts of the contracts, we can begin to release ourselves from the patterns at hand. Tune in next week for part two of “How to heal yourself from soul contract relationships” for more information on techniques to heal yourself.

For more information on soul contracts:










  1. wow this is so spot on i just got out of a narcissist relationship and with it all being said and done there of course is no closure and well it is making me definitely reflect upon myself as to why i let this happen to myself in the first place i sure hope i can learn and heal from all this

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am glad this resonated. So many people are in these situations and feel helpless! Its so important to forgive yourself before anything else 🙂 And.. trust your gut! I’m here if you need to talk xx
      – J Morgan Saifer

      Liked by 1 person

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